ask damn questions, dammit

 

 ask damn questions, dammit

 
Many* of my Readers enjoy sending me constructive criticism and requests - and you know what?

I listen.

I listen because it's the fans who make this all worthwhile. That's why I always take care to read every reader's email, no matter how inane, and send a personalised reply, then track them down and leap out at them. They deserve nothing less.

Now, many* of my Readers ask me, 'Nick, could you occasionally write bite-sized job-seeking and interview tips that can be consumed without my having to plough through all the usual tedious padding?'
Well, today, I thought I'd give the readers what they're begging for, so I can get this over with and resume eating a toasted sandwich.
Here's my top interview tip for the day. Some readers may have noticed that I gave this same advice in my last post.

Tip: Ask questions, damn it!

No, not about how much holiday you get. Ask about the technology that the company produces (if relevant). Ask what makes the company unique. Ask what interests them about your background. Ask what are the strongest and weakest links on their production chain. Ask about the company culture and how it differs from that of your current or last company. Ask ask ask.
Next post: some stuff about asking questions that I couldn't fit into this post because of some readers' unreasonable demands.

* Many? I meant 'none'.

a spuddy good new year

a spuddy good new year

Being a so-so computer hacker, I've managed to track down most of my readers and wish them happy new year in person, either by jumping out at them on their way to work or just showing up at their kitchen window dressed in a cape. But to those of you who are sans my new year's well-wishes: happy new year! Hope your January is everything you wished it would be, within the boundaries of decency.
Business seems to be picking up, which is good. Companies are hiring, which is good news for those folks whose public sector jobs are being flushed so liberally down the toilet by a government that still hasn't developed the backbone to stop the bank bosses from using our bailout money to pay themselves ridiculous amounts of money.
Anyway, no matter how horrible your shifting circumstances, there's one constant in this world: the cutting-edge content of this blog. You can look forward to another year of employment insights, career tips and just good old fashioned typing, with red hot editorials comin' atcha as often as once in four months. 
Speaking of which, I brought semi-homemade chilli to work today, and some butter in a tupperware pot, but I forgot my potato, if you can believe that. So I asked the Boss, who was going down to the market at lunch (this would be around 12.48), to pick me up a potato. She came back with four pounds of potatoes, all earthy, some of them huge. I selected a potato the size of my head, then went to the toilets to scrub it under the tap. Afterwards my hands were wet, as was the potato, so I dried them under the hand-dryer, and somebody walked into the toilets. Now, if I walked into the toilets and saw someone holding a potato under a hand-dryer, I genuinely believe I would quickly reach a cogent rationalisation, rather than, say, look at the person as though I'd caught him smelling my hair on a bus. But this guy just went white, turned around and walked off really quickly. I mean, come on.
Stay tuned, reader - 2014 is gonna be one crazy ride!

Job board mystique..... and the need for cover information

Picture it, dire Reader.

Deep in HTS's secret mountainside nerve-centre, our lead consultant is scrolling through the latest CV postings on an internet job board. She's looking for a Business Systems Analyst* with strong Business Objects experience (or "strong BO"). Naturally, some of the four million candidates turning up in her search have all the relevant terms on their CVs, but are, on closer inspection, not Business Systems Analysts* with strong Business Objects experience. No: they are golf coaches, mobile aquarium attendants and horse whisperers. But some of the candidates in her search results are Business Systems Analysts* with strong Business Objects.

She smiles.

'A hearty yield,' she says, reaching across the control panel to open the CV document of a promising-looking candidate.

Then she stops. Her finger hovers.
Her finger moves to the left. Drops on a button set into a small box.

'Lemuel, hold my calls.'

Before you can say 'Yes, ma'am', Lemuel has said, 'Yes, ma'am'.

The consultant nods to herself. Something on the screen has drawn her attention.

Some avant-garde maverick has gone and posted a CV with absolutely no cover information at all. Despite the fact that this particular job board enables you to indicate where you live, what your current job is, where you work, what sort of role you're looking for, how much money you're after, whether you're looking for permanent of temporary work, and possibly some other things.

Nothing. To get any information about this cat, the consultant is going to have to open the CV and find all that stuff out for herself.

She looks up. The Boss is approaching. She can hear her ice cubes tinkling. Walking over, the Boss sets down her glass. The crystal makes a thud. 'Something interesting?'

'Just some fascinating daredevil who plays by his own rules,' the lead consultant says. 'Just some straight-talking cattle-hustler who isn't afraid to ask the hard questions.'

The Boss says, 'What?'

'I like this guy,' the consultant hisses. 'I like his style.' A jab at a button. 'Lemuel? Bring me my cat-fur. I've found the candidate I'm looking for - and I'm going to bring him in.'

Alternatively, you could picture the following scene.

Our lead consultant is looking for a Business Systems etc* and her search results bring up five million results and she's zipping through them and she doesn't look at your CV because she didn't even notice it because it has no cover information at all. She might notice it later on, but she might not.

Moral of the second story: if you're using job boards, get the important information up front.

Oh and btw, don't think because it's coming up to Christmas, we are slowing down. Vacancies are coming in thick and fast. WE NEED YOUR CV ( plus cover info of course)

 

HPC Application & Support Analyst Developer, 30K-40K+ Generous Pension, Warwickshire

 

 

HPC Application & Support Analyst Developer, 30K-40K+ Generous Pension, Warwickshire

Job Reference:	WS/JH/15417
Job Title:	HPC Application & Support Analyst Developer, 30K-40K+ Generous Pension, Warwickshire
Salary:	£30k to £40K + Generous Pension
Location:	West Midlands
Sector:	IT
Type:	Permanent
Job Description :	Application & Support Analyst Developer, 30K-40K+ Generous Pension, Warwickshire Our client is looking for an experienced HPC Applications and Support Analyst to expand the pre-sales and post-sales technical support, training and consultancy activity at their Warwick office. Keywords: developer, programmer, support, applications analyst, HPC, high performance computing, parallel computing, C++, fortran, linux, unix, scientific programming, West Midlands, Oxfordshire, Worcestershire, Coventry, Warwickshire, Birmingham, Northamptonshire You'll be part of a talented and fun team, passionate about scientific computing and about doing the job well. This is an opportunity to work at the cutting edge of development tools for parallel and multi-threaded computing. A strong customer-oriented approach is required, providing first line support for development tools, training and application performance and debugging consultancy. Candidates will need to hold a good post-graduate degree or equivalent in a mathematical/scientific computing discipline. Experience developing HPC software and working with both large scale HPC codes and with Linux/Unix HPC systems is essential. This job is UK-based and is open to candidates eligible to work in the UK. Main Duties • Work as part of a small team to deliver high quality first level of support to customers and prospects • Provide technical consulting to customers installing and using client's products • Prepare and deliver technical training, workshops and documentation materials at customer sites • Provide occasional debugging and profiling consulting at customer sites • Work with customers to increase tool adoption and to build customer relationships • Write and develop on-line technical collateral, including training material, blogs and white papers Experience and Skills Essential: • Good post-graduate degree or equivalent in computer science, maths or computational sciences • Strong parallel programming skills (OpenMP, MPI, CUDA and/or OpenCL) • Fortran and C/C++ experience • Hands-on experience of HPC, using batch schedulers, profilers, debuggers, compilers, etc. • Excellent communication skills and written English. Desirable but not essential: • Experience using DDT and/or MAP • Prior experience as an applications analyst • Knowledge of different HPC applications • Knowledge of UNIX/Linux system administration. This position will require around 25% travel throughout Europe (mainly), depending on location and business opportunities. CVs to Jayne at HTS. 0121 687 1234 07970 494916 Connect with us at LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jaynehannon Or follow the link to our popular blog: www.hts.mrresourceful.blogspot.com Visit our website: www.hts.co.uk HTS, Specialist Recruiters. Contract and Permanent Vacancies.

Graduates! Graduates! Would you like to be earning £50K in 5 years time?

 

Guaranteed graduate job, anyone?

Students! Best opportunity around!


Graduate Developer, any language as x-training provided, potential to be earning c£50K in 5 years’ time. Don’t miss this opportunity! West Midlands


Our client, a highly regarded and well-established Microsoft centric organisation based in the West Midlands, has requirements for two Graduate Software Developers with exposure to any language considered.


This is a junior role, but typically successful candidates will be heavily involved in new projects and more complex customisations within 2-3 years.

Training of six weeks of residential intensives course in Staffordshire will be provided over the first four months (two weeks in January, then a week per month until May) alongside guidance by your mentor using Microsoft self-study learning material, Prometric testing and on the job experience.
Microsoft Certifications will need to be achieved within the relevant areas of functionality.

Duties:
Developing new / changed software to new and existing customers.
To provide assistance to the development team (MS SQL database management, code management).
Writing reports for customers using Visual Studio / SQL Report Builder.
Assisting with testing and diagnosis of resulting solutions including providing helpdesk assistanc
Education:
Computing Science / Computing for Business / IT or Business 2:1 or 1st class degree
classifications ONLY with programming experience
Skills:
1. Software development (any language)
2. Analytical
3. Attention to detail
Desirable skills
SQL Reporting skills / Microsoft .Net skills

Commutable from West Midlands, Birmingham, Worcestershire, Shropshire, Staffordshire
In order to take advantage of this great opportunity please send your CV without delay to jayne@hts.co.uk.

 

CVs to Jayne at HTS.
0121 687 1234
07970 494916
Connect with us at LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jaynehannon
Or follow the link to our popular blog: www.hts.mrresourceful.blogspot.com
Visit our website: www.hts.co.uk
HTS, Specialist Recruiters. Contract and Permanent Vacancies


You're welcome!

Apple- why I won't bite!

Apple - why I won't bite

 

 

Mrs Resourceful is an outdoor kind of lady. She can name plants. Her favourite novelist is Jack Bivouac (favourite novel: Off the Road). She enjoys the kind of walks where you have to stop and bang your shoes against stiles to get the mud off. It was on one of these walks that I had my one fleeting experience of owning an Apple iPhone.

We found it in some forest or other, just lying there, an Apple in the woods. In order to find the owner, I had to pretend for about half an hour that it was my phone. Hundreds of phone calls, some wildlife photography and a little internet browsing later, we arranged a meeting with the owner, who met us by a church I'd sent his wife photographs of. I think I also sent her a Wikipedia entry and a map. The owner showed up almost sobbing with gratitude. His child was in the back of the car, also sobbing with joy. The owner gave us a bottle of wine.

I could see why he was happy to have the iPhone back - my phone doesn't even have a camera.
Imagine! A phone without a camera!

Here's the thing, though: all this happened a while ago. That guy's phone is now old news. It's nowhere near as flashy as the new iPhone, which has greatly increased capabilities and a toaster.
Imagine! A phone without a toaster!

Radio 4 recently had a feature about how Apple is set to become the biggest corporation on the planet, and things that big exert a lot of gravitational pull. And yes, I would love, say, an iMac. But even though I consider their products veritable style icons, I can't get into Apple.

My problem is this: I don't want to buy a style icon only to find that it is superseded a few months later. A few years ago I came close to buying an iMac, back in the days when I considered buying expensive things. But by the time I'd sold a kidney to fund the purchase (not mine, thankfully), there'd been a press release about a newer version, which was thinner and had some sort of black trimming. Imagine if I'd bought the old one!
Imagine! A computer without black trimming!

Style icons shouldn't evolve too quickly. Sinclair brought out some variations on the ZX Spectrum, but everyone knows what the real thing looked like; there was only one definitive model. But Apple try to keep us perpetually frothing at the chops over their next release, and I don't want to do all that frothing, thanks. Until they slow down, I'll stick with a cheap laptop that works, and view the Apple parade from afar.

Interestingly, I managed to convince an owner of the old iPhone last weekend that my phone is the new iPhone. My phone is actually a Doro Easyphone, which I got, truth be told, as a joke. It has big buttons, a deafening ring tone, an emergency button on the back that you can press if you fall down and break your hip. No internet, no camera, no toaster. But my interlocutor clearly believed me. I had to explain to the iPhone owner that I was kidding. In retrospect, I should have sold it to her.
You see, if the cool companies change their flagship products every other week, nobody knows if your piece of crap is, or isn't, the latest incarnation of something ultra desirable.

You could have some fun with that.

Mr Resourceful
 

the whys and wherefores of interview tips

the whys and wherefores of interview tips

I've said before - haven't I, Reader, haven't I? - that books on job interview tips are inevitably 99% fluff, because all meaningful job interview tips are self-evident and require no explication.

• Dress smart.
• Don't eat a boiled sweet during the interview.
• Research the company beforehand.
• Don't badmouth your last employer.
• Don't cancel the interview THE DAY BEFORE and ask if it can be rescheduled for next week.

Granted, there are some tips that raise questions. For example:
My tip: Ask questions.
You: What kind of questions?
Me: Good question.
The thing is, these kinds of questions can usually be answered in short sentences:
Me: Ask questions that show you're interested in the company, and questions that show you've researched the company.
You: Such as?
Me: (suddenly rising and overturning a table) Can't you people think for yourself for once? Can't you even -
Anyway, I was thinking today how maybe I'm wrong. Maybe some of my interview advice isn't as perspicuous as I imagined. At any rate, recruiters like me keep posting interview tips on blogs, and candidates keep turning up to interviews dressed in jeans, eating boiled sweets, and slagging off their previous employers. So, to begin to make amends, let me expand a little on the tips listed above.

• Be clean, wear a suit, tuck things in. Why? Because there are occasions where it's appropriate to wear a certain kind of clothing, and a job interview is one of those occasions.
• Don't eat boiled sweets during an interview. Why? Because you're not seven years old, you're not in a playground, and also you don't want to drool while you're discussing Unix shell scripting. (If you naturally drool while discussing Unix shell scripting, seek counsel.)
• You should research the company. Why? Because you're going for a job interview. A job interview is where you show that you want to work at the company in question. If you don't know anything about the company, you can't do that.
• You should avoid badmouthing your last employer for the excellent reason that the people interviewing you are not your personal therapists. They are here to talk about how you may or may not fit into their organisation; anything else is a waste of their time. They could be doing other things, fun things, with the time that you are wasting. They could be standing around playing a game they call 'Firing Squad', which involves firing rubber bands at a polystyrene cup placed on top of a filing cabinet, a cup to which they have affixed a tiny blindfold made of masking tape - or sometimes they call the game 'Gangsta Drug Bust', which is a variation that includes some slow-motion leaping and diving and addressing the cup as 'honky'. But no - they're listening to you moan about how you were the only person in your office who ever made coffee.
• Re. cancelling the interview THE DAY BEFORE and asking if it can be rescheduled for next week - how do you think this makes you look? If you can't show up on a day you've already agreed to show up on, and you're okay with leaving your prospective employers with two hours and an empty room to fill, what else will you not be able to do? If you're unreliable even before you get the job, how much more unreliable will you become once you have your feet under a desk? Presuming you ever turn up for work at all.

Hope this helps!